1. a traditional or legendary story, usually concerning some being or hero or event, with or without a determinable basis of fact or a natural explanation, especially one that is concerned with deities or demigods and explains some practice, rite, or phenomenon of nature.

2. stories or matter of this kind: realm of myth.

3. any invented story, idea, or concept: His account of the event is pure myth.

The first section of Speaking Out address 5 “popular myths about drug legalization”. These are:

  1. The enforcement of drug laws contributes to violence along the Southwest border
  2. Legalizing and taxing marijuana will help local economies by reducing crime and increasing tax revenue
  3. Drug laws infringe on states’ rights
  4. Prohibition didn’t work in the 20’s and it doesn’t work now
  5. Through drugs laws, Congress is attempting to legislate morality

I have to say I’m disappointed. There’s a whole ‘Legalization Lobby’, whose existence is significant enough a threat to warrant  capital “L’s and also a whole book dedicated to countering our lies, and this is our mythology? This is the lamest mythology ever. Where’s our creation story? Where are our heroes?

There are way better myths that the legalization lobby has floating around- like how George Washington grew hemp, and Martha used to roll joints for him (thank you, Dazed and Confused) or how God must want us to smoke pot, or otherwise he wouldn’t have put the plant on Earth in the first place (Bill Hicks), or how Mick Jagger has been using legally prescribed heroin for years and he’s doing fine (I can’t remember where I heard that. I think a man in a pub told me, so it must be true.)

As drug mythologies go, this is one of my favorite narratives:

Anyway. These 5 myths are are not our most popular myths. DEA, you have besmirched our culture and offended our people. Shame on you.

video via Dangerous Minds